So, Nala just introduced me to this amazing site called the Thought catalog and there were so many posts about things you should do before 25, 24, 15,16 and so on, and i honestly enjoyed reading all of them, they were so accurate and funny that i decided to write one on my own. Things you shouldn’t do but you probably will before you turn 21.
1. SAY NO.
ok so if you’re staying in an apartment and some of your friends decide to come over anytime after 8pm, Please say No. Three people will turn into nine and then fifteen and then your house will be filled with people you don’t know about and probably too drunk to remember and by the end of the night you’ll be spitting chalk and breaking eggs on peoples head, and don’t even get me started on the morning after it will probably come with a bad ass hangover and skid marks.
2. DATE A CLOSE FRIEND.
I know it sounds perfect, but trust me. Its not. No matter how perfect you think it will be, it will turn out to be a mistake. You will end up getting comfortable too fast too soon, and will probably end up losing your virginity and your will to log into Facebook ever again. (p.s- Nala, please stop laughing).
3. GO TO COLLEGE DRUNK/HUNGOVER.
Trust me, I know it sounds really cool. ITS NOT. you will end up drawing weird stuff on your notebook and drooling because you slept while drawing something weird on your notebook. And never confuse the sexy messy hungover look they show in movies. You WILL look like shit.
4. HAVE SEX WITHOUT A CONDOM.
ok people, pregnancy is not as funny and adventurous as they show in katherine heigl movies, it is scary and disgusting and painful and probably kill you, specially when you’re still a kid. It might feel great doing it without one for a while, but a baby coming out of your vagina won’t. Always use protection. Be safe and sexy.
5. GET CHEAP STREAKS.
Ok, I know it looks good on t.v, But it won’t on you. Cheap streaks ESPECIALLY the red colour which is oh-so-popular with college freshmen and school girls. WE GET IT GIRLS, YOU LOOK COOL, lets wait for the dirty bleached blonde hair to start showing now, shall we?
6. MAKE OUT WITH A FRIEND’S EX.
Never be the other girl. EVER. the guilt is bad and it probably will spoil the fun of doing it.
7. MAKE OUT WITH YOUR FRIEND’S EX, AGAIN.
So maybe he’s cute and Maybe you like the rebellious rush you get of doing it with that guy again because everybody told you, you shouldn’t and you can’t. You are not Barney Stinson, do not take it as a “Challange-Accepted” situation. You are being plain stupid. This is not “How I Met Your Mother”, but if you go through with it, i will however, turn out to be “How I Didnt Let Your Dad Meet Your Mother”.
8. GET HIGH.
ok who am i kidding.
9. NOT GO FOR A TRIP WITH BEST FRIENDS.
I know its about things you shouldn’t do but will end up doing, but this is one thing you should DEFINITELY do. Go to a place with your girlfriends, get drunk and pass out on the beach, Go to the mountains, make a bonfire smoke some weed and sip some wine or Go to a place for adventure sports. (Speaking from a personal experience, nothing will give you more pleasure than seeing your friend fall in a rapid during white water river rafting and telling them to “keep breathing!! help is coming” while they are underwater struggling to not die and hold on to the safety rope of the raft. Do i look like Aquaman?).
10. CONFRONT/BREAK-UP WITH SOMEBODY THROUGH A SOCIAL NETWORKING SITE.
It is the most immature and annoying way to deal with things, but then again, everybody at this age is immature and annoying. Try not to get too ‘E’-motional over the internet, be it with your friend or someone you’re dating, its a douchebag move, but then again, we all our just two peas in a pod. Except both the peas are stupid. very stupid.
11. GET A TATTOO
i don’t know why, but these days i see tatted teenagers everywhere, and the best part comes is when you ask them about it and what it means to them, they will tell you heartwarming story about how they went to the tattoo parlor, went through some sketches got an epiphany and then got a symbolic tattoo of a fly on their body. Get inked only when you are sure about what you want and where you want it and what it will mean to you. Tattoos are like kids, Once you have them you can never ignore them (unless you die or like you have money to get laser done, I don’t know man). But take my advice, if you ever get a chance of getting a multicolored naked fairy sitting on a mushroom holding a star tattoo on your back, please slap yourself, say no, and walk away before that naked fairy takes all your dignity away.
12. FALL IN LOVE
Being a 20 year old is hard, you have nothing but chaos going on in your life at this age, you have no money, no good clothes, and if you are God’s special child, you might even spot a strand of grey hair. Your emotions are all messed up and heightened at this age and your life is dominated by three MAJOR urges - Always horny, Always Hungry and ALWAYS Sleepy (I call it the HHS syndrome). The last thing you would need is to fall in love, Please don’t do it. But you probably will, and If you have good friends, they will always be there standing behind you to support you, but mainly to make fun of your crappy situation, BUT if you’re really lucky they will come holding a joint, some tea and a one way ticket to ‘I told you so’.